Forgive me if this post is a little jumbled. I am typing it out on my iPhone because looking at my computer for too long hurts my head. But I feel the need to write. So here goes.
Last time I wrote about how I thought my antidepressants were messing with my head. And they sure may have been. But it turns out something else is going on in this brain of mine.
Last week I suddenly started feeling even more out of it. My balance was off. I couldn’t think straight. I basically felt drunk all the time, and like I was wearing way-too-strong prescription glasses. I got really nauseous. I had migraines and when I didn’t, there was so much pressure in base of my head I felt like someone was squeezing it. By Friday I wasn’t functioning much at all.
On Saturday an urgent care doc diagnosed me with vertigo. Okay, I thought. This sucks, but at least I know what’s going on. I went home with instructions to take meclazine, sudafed, anti-nausea pills, and a directive to rest. I’d be better soon, the doc assured me.
By Tuesday nothing had changed, and with BlogU approaching, I was starting to panic. I needed to feel better. STAT. So I ended up meeting with an ear, nose, and throat doc, who said, Nope – you don’t have vertigo. At all. I think this is neurological and you need a specialist.
A couple hours later my doc calls me and tells me I need a CAT scan right away “to rule out anything urgent.”
And that’s when my heart really started to sink. I have something called a chiari malformation (CM). Basically, part of my brain is too big for my skull and sticks out the base of my skull a little. It’s never been an issue. But all these symptoms point to it acting up – perhaps putting pressure on my spine. If it is the CM, and I don’t get better, it means brain surgery.
Brain surgery, people. Someone cutting open my head and releasing pressure at the base of my skull. Maybe sawing off some bone. Not exactly how I was planning my summer, you know? I always knew it was a possibility but I’ve been fine for so long. I never worried about it. Until now.
The CAT scan ruled out scary stuff like a stroke or tumor, thank God. But now I’m in limbo until I get an MRI next week and meet with my neurologist.
My doc cleared me to travel, and my friend who is a doctor agreed. Hubs is reluctantly letting me get on a plane. So I’m still going to BlogU. I won’t really be myself, and I’ll be armed with lots of drugs to keep the pain/discomfort and nausea down. But I’d rather being laughing with friends and even napping in a dorm room when I’m too tired, than sitting home worrying about what could be wrong. Is it the CM? Is it something else? What the what is wrong with me???
So if you’re going to BlogU, I’ll be there. I won’t be 100%. But I’ll be there. And if you’re the praying type or believe in some sort of healing higher power, I’d appreciate your thoughts.
I’d love to just wake up and feel better. Maybe this is some bizarro virus and I will. Here’s hoping! But until then, I’ll be the slow-moving lady who may just smile and nod a lot since I can’t follow conversations all the time. Just smile and nod back, okay? 🙂
I can’t wait to meet all you BlogU people and #getschooled together!